Get Ready To Talk!

All of us have ups and downs.

Sometimes life is great. The next minute it feels like a disaster. For young people, learning to understand their emotions is an important part of life. Children and teens, like adults, face problems, stresses and conflict. Our emotional health allows us to succeed at home, school, work, and in the community.

Most of us have the skills to cope with the stresses of life. We have people in our lives who can offer support when times feel difficult. And some of us do not have emotional support in the form of family or friends. There are times in our lives when we do not have the skills to cope with stress or strong emotions like fear, anger or sadness. Sometimes people have problems staying emotionally healthy and at these times people need special help.

Physically and Emotionally Healthy

All parents know that visiting a doctor for a physical checkup is a way to stay healthy. We also know that being able to visit a counselor or therapist is a helpful way to become and stay emotionally healthy.

Healthy communities remain so because residents of all ages have access to both health care and counseling to support emotional health.

About Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is how we feel about ourselves. We want all children to have healthy self-esteem. This means that that we want every girl and boy to feel good about themselves. We want young people to feel positive about their ability to succeed in school, at play, and in family life.

Goals of "The Talk"

The goal of this "talk" is to help parents and children:

• Define terms related to self-esteem
• Define terms related to emotional health
• Discuss the importance of both physical and emotional health
• Discuss how to respond when one's emotions are difficult to cope with
• Identify where to go for help if there are problems with emotional health
• Discuss family rules about treating one another with respect, even when angry
• Discuss local community projects which can create safe environments and support young people's emotional health

As you explore

As you explore this site, you and your child can learn from a variety of activities. This "talk" includes the following family activities:

• Let's Talk Activities
• Videos
• Safety Rules
• Questions & Answers
• 10 Tips

You may also access the Google map directory of services, guide to resources, glossary of terms, calendar of events (to attend a Let's Talk parent workshop), or learn about local Community Projects your family can support.

Raising Resilient Kids

All of us face problems and challenges in life. Some young people seem to recover from problems more easily than others. This ability to bounce back after experiencing problems is called resiliency. Resiliency is being able to face tough times and cope with everyday challenges. It is a quality we wish to nurture in all children. Signs of resiliency include:

• positive relationships with caring adults
• social skills
• parental monitoring - with clear rules of conduct
• parental involvement in their children's lives
• secure and stable family life
• access to support services
• healthy leisure activities
• strong cultural identity and pride
• a positive school climate with norms that discourage violence.

Besides resilient people there are also resilient environments in homes, schools and communities. Deeply promoting resilient children means reducing risk factors such as poverty, growing up in a violent environment or with people abusing alcohol and drugs. The more a child is cared for, nurtured and respected, the more she or he is buffered from risk factors.

What's Normal?

Emotional health and emotional problems are a normal part of life. Sometimes people have problems like depression that result in feeling sad. Sometimes people are sad for long periods of time. Depression in children and adults can be helped by seeking support from friends, family and a mental health care professional. One person with emotional problems can make life challenging for the entire family, so finding support is always a healthy thing to do.

One tragic consequence of emotional problems is suicide. Until the last few decades, suicide has been a family issue that was only whispered about. Today, while there is still reluctance to openly address the issue in some families and communities, public information about suicide, emotional problems, and mental illness is growing. This information can be found online, in the mass media and through support groups. In New Mexico, the high youth suicide rate highlights the importance of asking the urgent question: "What can be done to reduce the rate of youth suicide in our diverse communities?"

Suicide: A Significant Problem

Youth suicide is a serious public health problem in New Mexico. Suicide is the second leading cause of death in youth 15-24 years of age.

About Suicidal Behaviors

Suicidal behavior refers to completed suicide, but also encompasses a wide range of suicidal behaviors that range from attempts with a definite intention to die -- to attempts that are a cry for help from someone in emotional distress.

Suicidal ideation is a term for thoughts about suicide. Thoughts about suicide may be as detailed as a formulated plan for suicide without the suicidal act itself.

Mental Illness

Approximately 90% of youth who commit suicide have a mental health condition, most commonly a mood or substance use disorder. In NM, close to a third of high school students reported symptoms of depression: feeling sad or hopeless every day for two weeks or more in the previous year. Youth who reported persistent feelings of sadness and hopelessness reported attempting suicide more frequently than youth who did not report these feelings.

Risk Factors for Youth Suicide

Previous suicide attempts -Teens who have attempted suicide in the past are much more likely than other teens to attempt suicide again in the future. Approximately a third of teen suicide victims have made a previous suicide attempt.

Depression and/or alcohol or substance abuse - Over 90% of teen suicide victims have a mental disorder, such as depression, and/or a history of alcohol or drug abuse.

Family history of mental disorders, substance abuse, or suicide - Teens who kill themselves have often had a close family member who attempted or committed suicide.

Stressful situation or loss -Teens who kill themselves almost always have serious problems, such as depression or substance abuse. When they experience losses or certain stressful situations, it can trigger a suicide attempt. Such stressful situations include: getting into trouble at school or with the police; fighting or breaking up with a boyfriend or a girlfriend; and fighting with friends or with family.

Getting Ready to Talk

The Let's Talk activities help parents and their children discuss self-esteem, emotional health, emotional problems, the normal changes of moods, how to ask for help, and how to keep positive even when facing life's challenges.